


Sorrows

by Poochenthecreator (orphan_account)



Series: Secrets Universe [3]
Category: Hermitcraft RPF, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Abuse, Child Abuse, Gen, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Past Abuse, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-11-26 10:50:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20929007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Poochenthecreator
Summary: It's been less than a year since Python has returned home and, while Shy isn't big on parties, he'll have a birthday party for his friends. Nothing can go wrong! Well, until his mother is invited.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Transphobia, implied death, violence, abuse

Grian felt the happiest he had been in a long while; hell, with everything that had gone on within the past 2 years, he was surprised he could be happy. It has been about 10 months since Python had come home and, fortunately, his alters fit in perfectly. Viper loved the Convex- and maybe Cub a little too much- and often teamed up with them for pranks against the Architechs. Birch and Joe were fairly close, both having a love for song and poetry. Lief was the closest with Cub since they were technically the ones dating, though he often hung around Etho too. Grian supposed he should stop seeing Lief as a male. The alter had recently come out as a demiboy and requested they/them pronouns, which Grian didn’t mind considering he was trans himself.

He watched Emerald run around with Shy and Xisuma, who were both chasing after her playfully. “Don’t run too fast! She can’t catch you!” Grian called out, loving how his voice was getting deeper with each dose of T.

“You underestimate how fast toddlers can be, Gree-an!” Xisuma called out as Shy cackled upon hearing Xisuma’s butchering of their friend’s name. Every time Xisuma did that, Shy always had to stop to laugh.

Emerald squealed and ran to Grian, jumping into his arms. “Wing Dad! Dada X and Daddy can’t catch me!” She giggled and hugged her father the best she could with her tiny arms. “I’m gonna be fast when I grow up!” Her wings flapped wildly; she had already shed some of her downy baby feathers and was growing her gray juvenile feathers. She’d be learning to fly within a year.

“My sweet little Emerald!” Grian kissed her cheeks, making her scream in delight. “You’re growing up too fast for Wing Dad!”

“I’m only 5, Wing Dad!” She headbutt his chest, making Grian chuckle. “I turned 5 uh…” She counted on her fingers, muttering nonsense. “…This long ago!” She held up 5 fingers, signaling the 5 months since her birthday.

“Great job! You turned 5 only 5 months ago!” Grian kissed her cheek as Shy sat on the log next to him, panting loudly. Xisuma was next, taking off his helmet for some air. “When’s the next birthday anyways?” Grian asked Xisuma, looking to him.

“Uh… I think Iskall’s, in 2 months. Not many really share their birthday.” Xisuma chuckled before Shy spoke up, digging in his inventory.

“Damn, and I was thinking his birthday was before mine.” Shy took out an apple and began eating it. “Mine’s in…. Like… a week?” He shrugged. “Don’t keep track too much, if I’m honest.”

Grian wanted to jump up right away, but he kept still so Emerald wouldn’t fall from his lap. “Why not? You’re turning 26 in a week!”

“Eh, never been a party type of guy since I left home.” Shy spun the apple in his hand, seeming more focused on his own thoughts rather than eating now. It made Grian a bit worried but he brushed it off as Shy just having a weird thing about birthdays.

“Why don’t we have one? It’ll be nice.” Xisuma smiled and Grian chimed in, wanting to help.

“We’ll handle everything! You just show up!” He giggled and bounced in place, which caused Emerald to squeal in delight.

“Sure, why not? Nothing too big, though.” Shy took a bite from his apple but clearly didn’t want to eat anymore, worrying Grian once more; Shy loved food. “Big parties are… kind of weird for me. I don’t like my own parties being big. Anyone else? Have fun! Me? I prefer get togethers rather than massive blowouts.”

“Great! We’ll make it causal!” Grian chirped, feathers fluffing in delight. He was eager to put Shy’s odd behavior behind them.

“Cool. I mean, just because I haven’t had a party since I joined the Council doesn’t mean I want it to be big.”

Wait, _what?_ Shy’s last birthday party was almost a decade ago! Now, Grian knew he had to make it special. “Don’t worry,” he hummed out. He was already formulating a plan.

* * *

Grian held a piece of paper with an address on it in his hands and looked to Etho. “Are you sure this is the right place?” He was nervous and his ruffled feathers made it show.

“The Council records show that this is his mom’s home.” Grian had asked Etho for help after Shy offhandedly mentioned missing his mother. Well, not exactly missing his mother but it seemed like it.

He had said “I kind of miss being with my mom like when I was young.” So, Etho and Grian took this as a sign to find Shy’s mom. It had been… far more difficult than either of them had imagined. Shy’s past was hidden in many ways and was an overall pain to get to. Hell, it took Etho having to ask Healer to beg Informant to at least tell them where Shy’s mother was. Council members usually didn’t have this well-hidden pasts, right? Etho said that this was unusual.

Grian knocked on the door of the massive mansion that, while it had similar colors to one, put any and all woodland mansions to shame. A tall woman answered; she looked almost exactly like Shy, though she had brown eyes rather than Shy’s blue. “Hello. Who might you two be?” Her voice was sweet with… something strange to it. That something put Grian on edge for some reason.

“Uhm… You’re… Shy’s mother, right?” Grian asked, mouth suddenly dry. He felt as if every word after that had to be forced out. “Shy is having a birthday party in a few days and I figured you coming might be a nice surprise!” He tried to fake the enthusiasm he needed.

The woman blinked and tilted her head in confusion, musing. “Shy…? I don’t… recall that name- Oh! Laurelsong! Yes, my daughter. How is she?”

“Uhm… _He’s_ doing great, and he goes by Shy now. Uhm… Just come to the party?” Grian felt really uncomfortable in this woman’s presence all of a sudden.

“I will. Put Skoyae on the RSVP. Or Skye. Either is fine.” She waved and closed the door.

“…Holy fuck.” Grian coughed, realizing he had been holding his breath for some amount of time. “She’s… uh…”

“She has intense energy,” Etho finished. “But, she’s invited. I’m sure Shy will be happy.” He smiled. “Let’s go home and rest. That tired me out more than it should have.”

* * *

Shy was happy. He had his family and… it honestly was nice. The hermits were just talking and wishing him a happy birthday as they passed by. Hell, they had gotten him gifts but were so casual in giving them that he couldn’t be mad at them for ignoring his request of no gifts. It was mainly stuff to stop him from dying in this damned world, which he actually had yet to since he joined. Everyone joked that permadeath was a thing for him with how much he avoided death. They… weren’t entirely wrong.

Grian bounced over to Shy with a grin and laughed. “Okay, Shy. I know I haven’t given you your gift yet but that’s because they’re not here yet!” _They’re?_ “I worked really hard to find her and-“

A portal opened up and out came Informant, who wore her usual dark cloak- it covered it her face and other features- and following her was- “Hello, Laurelsong!”

“Oh, hey… uh… Mom.” Shy groaned and shoved Grian aside, walking to his mother. _Of course_ Grian would invite her. Shy personally didn’t blame Grian for this, but he was still pissed. After all, he ran away from home for a very good reason! Even if Grian didn’t know why.

“Oh, sweetie. You look so adorable playing dress up! Now, stop playing pretend and come home with me, Laurelsong.” Everyone tensed and an awkward silence fell over the group.

“Mom, no.” Shy was determined to stay here. He was grown, after all! He could make his own life decisions! “This is my home. I am home. I’m… happy.” He took a step towards Skoyae. “I’m not going with you.”

“Oh, my sweet little song-“ Skoyae hummed out and stepped towards Shy.

“I’m not your song nor am I your daughter. Please. Leave.” Shy made his voice monotoned with some firmness, trying to be strong.

“Laur-“

“And I’m not Laurelsong, Laokel, or whatever you call me. I’m Shy. I have a wonderful boyfriend, a beautiful daughter, and the most perfect platonic partner. I’m Shy, the man who lives with his family on Hermitcraft. Hermitcraft is my home.”

“…Sweetie, you’re a goddess. I know it’s in you to play pretend with mortals but it’s time to come home.”

Shy tensed and looked to his friends, who were all in varying levels of disbelief over Shy being a god. He was surprised they didn’t notice sooner, but he shook off his thoughts and looked back to his mother, who kept speaking. “With you being the Goddess of Information, you know that there’s only so much information to be gained in one area. It’s time to leave these silly mortals behind and take your place beside me once more.”

“No.” Shy’s voice was firmer than before. He was shaking but he needed to be strong.

“Excuse me?” Skoyae was in obvious disbelief.

“I’m not going with you, Mo- No. You’re not my mother! You’re a transphobic piece of garbage who emotionally and physically abused me because of something I can’t help! I’m happy! I’m fine and I don’t need you in my fucking life ever again, Skoyae!” He glared at the woman he once called his mother, her face contorting to one of pure rage.

“I never thought I’d have to punish you at 260 years old but… Laurelsong… I think I have to take away your toys.” She raised an arm and let her goddess form take over in a wave of dark blue energy. She stood tall with glowing eyes, wings of red magic, dark purple energy flowing from her hands, her feet killing whatever they touched, and a halo of broken rocks and souls. “Sweetie, as the Goddess of Chaos… I have to do this.”

It all happened so quickly. Skoyae stomped the ground and it crumbled as blades of energy sliced at Shy’s friends. Everyone scattered and even Informant ran to hide; Shy didn’t blame her, for she was a newer aid thanks to the previous dying about 255 years ago. Shy dodged out of the way of his mother’s grasp and ran into a building, spotting Doc dragging a very injured Ren away from danger. Hell, she had even hurt Nate by breaking the 9 year old’s leg. _‘What are horrible woman… hurting a kid,’ _Shy thought bitterly.

Shy screamed when he almost ran into Xisuma, who was hiding with Grian and Emerald. “Guys! You’re okay!”

“Y-yeah,” Grian stammered out, gripping Emerald close. “Shy, you’re a god?!”

“Uh… yeah. I uh…” Shy felt his throat go dry. Would they want him on the server still? “I haven’t reached full power and… I’m not sure how. But, that’s beside the point! We need to stop Skoyae!”

“I never knew she was so horrible!” Grian cried out. “I’m sorry! This is my fault!” He whimpered and teared up.

“Shut the hell up! It’s not your fault.” Shy peeked out and saw Skoyae grabbing Nate. “…She’s going to kill him…” He muttered, heart dropping to the pit of his stomach. “Grian, don’t blame yourself. Xisuma. You’re a really awesome boyfriend and I love you. Take care of Emerald for me, bye!” He took off towards the woman he once called mother.

“Gods don’t respawn. Once they’re gone, they’re gone…” Shy muttered to himself as he grabbed a sword from the ground; it was Doc’s. He jumped onto a rock and leaped up, swinging at the Goddess of Chaos. She grabbed him and threw him to the ground, letting go of Nate and allowing him to get away. Exactly what Shy knew she would do.

“How dare you attack me! Your own mother!” She used her powers to collapse the ground around Shy and earth began suffocating him. Yet, he clawed his way out as fast as he could and ran to her, blade ready. She tried grabbing him but he rolled out of the way, swinging his sword towards her chest.

_Then, pain. _

Shy blinked and shuddered in pain at the blade of destructive energy slicing through his chest and through his lungs, which now burned with the sheer power of the attack and the blood filling them. Yet, his mother was barely clinging to her own life. He had hit her heart and even a goddess couldn’t handle such a blow for long.

The energy faded as Skoyae fell to the ground, dropping Shy as she reached her end. Shy hit the ground and coughed while struggling for air. He noticed his friends rushing to help him but he was already too weak. He closed his eyes and let his life play out before him as blood filled his lungs and drowned him.


	2. Chapter 2

It’s honestly _pretty_ early in the morning. Far earlier than Laurelsong ever wants it to be. But, Mama insists on dressing her up so they could go out and interact with the local mortals. Something about how mortals haven’t seen Laurelsong since her father died. It was always a sad day when a god died, even if Laurelsong didn’t remember it.

“Mama! I don’t wanna go!” Laurelsong whines and struggles against the dress Skoyae is trying to put on her. “I wanna play!”

“Yes, my sweet song, but the mortals live for so little amount of time. It’s time to greet them.” Mama kisses Laurelsong’s forehead. “They’ll be so happy to see someone as special as you, my dear.”

“Why?” She is picked up by Mama. “I’m not special! I’m Laurelsong! Why are they happy to see me?”

“Sweetie, you’re a goddess with no affiliation. You’re so full of potential and everyone is excited to see what you’ll develop into.” Mama kisses Laurelsong and carries her from their big home. “Now, come on. We’re going to please these silly mortals.”

“Okay, Mama.” Laurelsong clings to Mama as they walk from their home. “Mama, when I grow up, I’m gonna get lost in our home! It’s biiiiiig!” She climbs onto Mama’s head but yelps when she feels a swat on her back. She climbs back down and whimpers, knowing she just did something wrong so Mama punished her for it. “Mama… I’m sorry.”

“Behave, my sweet song. Or you’ll turn into a discordant note.” Mama kisses Laurelsong’s forehead and brings her to the center of town. “You’re my perfect little song so… please… be nice.”

Laurelsong looks to the mortals. They’re so happy! But some look like they’re scared? She tilts her head but earns another swat, forcing her to straighten her back and try her best to look pretty like Mama taught her. “Hello, uhm… mortals!” She tries to talk like Mama, being loud and firm. But, she just screeches out her words instead, earning another swat; this one was to her mouth.

“Hello, everyone. This is my daughter, Laurelsong. She has yet to have an affiliation so, please, treat her kindly. Or… Well…” Mama does something out of Laurelsong’s sight that makes the mortals cringe in fear. Mama then sets Laurelsong down. “Be nice, dear. Tell me if any of them do something you don’t like. I’ll punish them for it.”

“Hello!” She smiles and walks to a mortal that seems about her age, though she knows it’s impossible for him to be 67 years old. “I’m Laurelsong!” She grins and holds out her hand. “Who are you?”

“Uhm… Lex…” He mutters, his black hair shining in the morning light. “U-uhm…” He hides behind his mother’s leg with tears in his eyes. “S-s-sorry.”

“Why?” Laurelsong reaches out to the boy. “You’re weird.”

“I a-am?” He hides more behind his mother, which makes Lauresong flinch. “Sorry.”

“Weird.” She sticks her tongue out at him.

“You’re n-not going to h-h-hurt me, are you?” He asks, earning a panicked ‘hush’ from his mother.

“No? Why?” Laurelsong is confused now. She’d never hurt someone!

“Your mommy hurts people…” Lex peeks out from behind his mother, who hushes him again.

“I’m sorry, dear. He’s still young and doesn’t understand everything yet,” the mother says, her green eyes full of fear and concern for her son’s wellbeing.

Laurelsong is even more confused but looks over when Mama calls her. “I have to go. Bye, Lex! I had fun!” She runs off, telling herself to play with Lex next time Mama lets her outside.

Mama picks her up and kisses her forehead, making her giggle. “Sweetie, are you having fun?”

“I am, Mama!” Laurelsong grins happily, her small wings of blue magic fluttering happily. “I met a boy named Lex and he’s funny weird!”

“Don’t count on him being here too long. Mortals age so much faster than us. They’re so weak and fragile. It’s best to just play with them and make these toys happy before they die.” Mama laughs and takes Laurelsong back inside, her footsteps quick and almost gliding.

“Mortals are toys, my sweet song. We can just do whatever we want with them. That boy you were talking to? Doesn’t matter what his name is. He’ll be dead and gone by the time you reach adulthood. Mortals are far too weak to live as long as us. So, don’t get attached.”

“Why, Mama?” Laurelsong yelps when Mama drops her and wonders what she did wrong. “Mama! That boy was nice and I liked him! He’s weird but I like weird. They’re not toys! Just weird people!” Mama swats her hand, making her whimper.

“We do not speak of mortals like that, my off key song. You’re not grasping the full picture and I feel like I have to punish you for even thinking mortals are anything but toys! They don’t care about you! They fear you!” Mama grabs Laurelsong’s hand and drags her to her room. “They will never love you like I do,” She says with a sickly sweet smile. “I love you, dear.”

She closes the door. Laurelsong whimpers and climbs onto her bed, almost tripping over the thin, pink cover she has hanging over it. “I made Mama mad…” She mutters.

She hears something and looks around before noticing a nice woman in dark clothes on her bookshelf, book in her hand as she reads. “Good morning, Laurelsong.” She looks down to the goddess, who smiles.

“Info!” She flutters her tiny wings until she’s level with the woman she calls Info, which is short for Informant. She just can’t pronounce it.

“It’s nice to see you again. I saw you talking to that boy.” Informant smiles and removes her hood, showing off raven black hair, tan skin, and dark brown- almost black- eyes. “He was nervous about being your friend.”

“I know. Mama makes them nervous! Why?” She pats Informant’s head, signaling she wants to be held.

Informant holds her close and chuckles. “Your mother is very powerful. Your father was powerful too.”

“What happened to Dada?” Laurelsong asks. Her father died when only 5 mortal years had passed so Laurelsong didn’t remember much.

“He… died protecting the Council. The family he had in it.” Informant sighs. “Your dada was the informant before me, you know.”

“Really?” Laurelsong gasps and giggles.

“Yes. He was very strong. He was very brave, too.” Informant giggles and kisses Laurelsong’s forehead.

“I like you better than Mama! You don’t swat me or punish me for asking questions! Can I live with you, Info?”

“O-oh. Uhm… Sorry. But you have to be 16 to join the Council. In your case, about 160 years old. You still have a long way to go, dear.” She smiles and ruffles Laurelsong’s brown hair. “You can visit. It’ll be our little secret, okay?”

“Yes! I wanna see!” She grins and hugs Informant. “I wanna see where Dada lived!”

“Don’t worry. I’ll show you.” Informant gasps when she hears footsteps. He sets Laurelsong on the floor and summons magic, hiding herself. “I’ll be back later, dear. We’ll visit tomorrow.”

Mama comes in a few seconds later, her face angry. “Laurelsong, who are you talking to?”

“A friend, Mama!” Laurelsong rocks back and forth on the balls of her feet. “She’s tall!”

“…Sweetie, we have mortals to play with. Enough with the imaginary friends, okay?”

“But Mam-“

“_Enough_. If you cannot behave and not talk back, then you can stay in your room. Goodnight, Laurelsong.” She slams the door shut, making Laurelsong whimper.

“…Night, Mama…” She tiredly mutters, climbing into bed and wondering how many weeks she was grounded for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter but that's because there wasn't too much information to give on this one.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Lots of abuse. Skip to end for quick summary if abuse in writing is not for you.

33 mortal years seems like so little time for Laurelsong. Lex is almost 40 and his life is already almost over. After all, many mortals tended to pass at 50-60. Medicine was advancing so wonderfully but it was still primitive, at best. That is one reason why Laurelsong is glad she’s a goddess- she can’t imagine having someone let her bleed out to release ‘demons’ or something. Mortals are weird.

Right now, she’s with her friend. Lex is reading a book to her; he actually wrote it! She adjusts herself on the stone bench and listens to her older friend read. “So, the shy little tree stump found friends in the witch’s cat and they now accepted that, while they were different, the witch still loved them and enchanted them for a reason. Everything would be fine as long as they had each other. The end.” He smiles and closes his book, which had been named _“The Shy Little Stump.”_

“Why’d you write about a possessed tree stump?” Laurelsong asks her friend, who only smiles in response.

“I had a twin brother before I met you. We think he became a ghost and possessed a stump near our house, bringing it back to life and allowing a tree to grow from it once again.” He puts away the book in his bag with a soft hum. “Spirits are finicky little strange things, hm?” He chuckles and ruffles Laurelsong’s hair, making her groan.

“Don’t do that, Lex!” She pouts before changing topics. “What was the tree stump’s name?”

“O-oh. Uhm. I don’t really have one so I guess… Shy? He is a shy little stump, after all.” He smiles and pats Laurelsong, who grins.

“Okay! I like that name! Can I be called Shy?” Laurelsong climbs onto her friend to see the area around them better.

“Uh… I suppose I can call you that,” he states awkwardly, setting his younger friend down. “That’s a boy’s name, though.”

Laurelsong feels her throat go dry and she steps away from Lex, shaking. She knows Mama wants her to be a girl. She knows Mama doesn’t like that she’s developed into the Goddess of Information rather than one of Destruction or Insanity. Something to “strike fear into mortals’ hearts!” as her mother put it.

“Uhm… Well, I don’t want to be a goddess anymore, Lex. I want to be a god. As in, a boy.” She whimpers and prepares herself to run. Hell, she had to run from Mama when she told her that she wanted to dress up like a boy. Her body still showed bruises from that.

“Well, okay. I can’t change how you feel, Laurelsong. I’ll treat you like a boy.” He shrugs and adjusts his bag. “Want me to call you Shy?”

“If you don’t mind?”

Lex ruffles his friend’s hair. “I’d never mind.”

* * *

Shy yells and slams the door shut, feeling the sheer power coming from Skoyae. “I knew interacting with mortals was a horrible idea, Laurelsong!” She screeches out, slamming against the wooden door with such beautiful designs on it that it almost hurt Shy to see it becoming damaged by Skoyae’s banging in prior incidents.

“You are my daughter and nothing can change that, my off key song!”

“Shut up! I’m not your daughter, Mom!” It had been only a mortal year since his talk with Lex and he told his mother that he wished to be a god over goddess. That made Skoyae snap and now Shy’s hiding away and begging his mother doesn’t break in. He doesn’t want to die!

He yells when the door breaks and Skoyae grabs him by the neck. She slams him against the wall and puts her face close to his, sheer hatred in her eyes as her goddess form wavers in her massive power. “You… you are spending too much time with mortals, dear.” Her voice was dripping with malice. “Maybe taking away your toys-“ She slams Shy against the wall again. “Will teach you that you’re my daughter. You’re Laurelsong.”

She drops Shy, leaving him gasping for air. “This is your fault, my sweet song. I told you that mortals are fragile. They are stupid and believe in things that aren’t real, such as the idea that you’re a boy. Now, be a good girl and stay up here, okay?” She walks out. Shy whimpers and looks out the window. He wants to be able to yell a warning to Lex, but explosions quickly fill the village and make him run to hide in his closet, sobbing into his arms.

“I want to go home… with Info…”

* * *

Shy screams and dives under his bed, forcing himself against the corner edge and away from his mother. Blood runs from his nose and gets his favorite shirt dirty. “I-I’m sorry, Mama!” He yells out, trying his best to avoid her grasp. “I j-just wanted to know s-s-something!”

“You disobeyed me! You know that you have to be punished!”

Shy shakes and knows, deep down, she’s right. He did mess up. He questioned his mother and he should just accept his punishment. He crawls out but is slammed to the floor right way, his face buried into his carpet. “I-I’m sorry, Mama…”

“Now, to answer your _ridiculous _question from earlier, no. No one has ever decided they wanted to be another gender and you’re just some spoiled, fucked up brat who is delusional thanks to all the mortals’ lies you believe! I can’t believe I let that one mortal get away!”

Skoyae had spared Lex by sheer luck. She spared random villagers so she would have something to rule over. “He’s filled your head with lies and nonsense!”

“It was all me, Mama…” He had to protect Lex’s family. He had to accept this.

“Then you know you must face a punishment, right? I can’t believe I still have to punish you at 112 years old, my horrible song.” She picks Shy up by the arm and stares at his limp figure. “I hate doing this but you really have to get these idiotic ideas out of your head!”

* * *

Shy didn’t move. He didn’t yelp, whimper, cry, or whine. He just… let the welts form on his arms nowadays. “Lex would have hated these…” He mutters, staring down at the grave of the man, who had passed from old age in what seemed like yesterday. “…I lost you. Info disappeared. And… Mom is… I don’t even know if this is normal.”

“_Psst.”_ Shy perks up at a whisper. He looks around before spotting Informant hiding behind a small group of graves. _“Come here.”_

He limps over and hugs his friend, sobbing softly. “O-oh Info!!! It’s horrible! S-she hurts me!”

“I know…” Informant hugs Shy back. “I’ve been trying to get in unnoticed but it’s a lot harder than you might think.” She stands up and opens a portal. “Quickly. Before she notices.”

“…She’ll hurt you too, Info. She’ll blame me and hurt you and… hurt me more. But, it’s my fault. I’ll be running away an- HEY!” He yells when she shoves him into the portal, closing it behind them. Shy is picked up by her right away and carried through a city towards what Shy feels like is a doctor’s place.

“You’re safe now, Shy,” she hums out.

“How’d you know my new nam-“

“I’m an Informant. I know very many things.” She holds Shy close and carries him inside, rubbing his back as he coughs at the smell of the doctor’s building. “She was abusive, your mother. I’m going to tell you that and make you know that it isn’t your fault. It was never your fault. And it never will be.”

She sets Shy down on a bed and a woman with a blue dress, clouded blue eyes, dark skin, and red hair walks in. “Informant. Is this the god you told me about?”

“Yes. Shy needs help, Healer.”

“I’ll get to work. How old is he?”

“127.” Informant rubs Shy’s back as Healer gives him a checkup. “Not old enough to join the Council but… I can’t let him die, Healer.”

“You did great. He’s lucky to have you.”

“It’s what his father would have wanted,” Informant mutters, comforting Shy as Healer made sure he was healthy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Shy picks out a new name thanks to a friend, decides he's a boy, Skoyae abuses him for it, and Informant takes him to the Council for safety.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You have no idea how hard this was to write. I've been depressed lately, as well as dissociating a lot and having bad writer's block.  
Even now, I'm not quite all here but whatever.

Time flew by way quicker than Shy could have ever imagined or even anticipated. He was currently 139 years old.. But, he feels empty. Then again, he’s been this way since he began to live with Informant. It’s tiring being almost perfect, after all. He has managed to make only minor mistakes around the woman who saved him, which still too much for the formerly abused god.

He sighs as he folds clothes. Then, he picks up on Informant’s footsteps- determining who was walking was a skill he had managed to gather while hiding from Skoyae during her many rages- so he decides to make sure the clothes look perfect with minimal wrinkles and neat folds. “Ah, hello Shy. You’re up early,” Informant walks up beside him and smiles upon seeing him doing laundry. “Already productive?”

He looks to her with his usual dull stare. He had learned long ago that emotions were not allowed. You just had to be pretend to be happy so Skoyae wouldn’t be pissed and punish him. “…It needed to be done,” he curtly states, flinching at the anger in his own voice.

Informant grabs her cloak from some laundry hanging above the dryer and pulls it over herself. “Shy. It’s been over 10 years and… you’re not making progress. I know you’re a god and they go by different time scales but… even then, it’s been a year for you. So, you’re coming with me today.”

Shy tenses and feels anxiety well up in his chest. He has no binder and the loose fitting clothing he has is dirty! He starts to shake but forces himself to stop. _‘No fear allowed…’ _He tells himself. “Sure.” He makes his voice as dull and emotionless as possible.

“…Shy, before we go… Are you happy here?” The question makes Shy tense again. He doesn’t really feel anything other than fear around Informant. Well, fear and something nice he can’t quite place. But, he’s afraid of making a mistake. Of ruining her image in public.

“…I’m… not sure, Info.” He sighs and looks to her. “Info, can I be honest?” He looks away quickly upon remembering that asking questions like that often got him in trouble in the past with Skoyae. His scarring showed that.

“You can be, Shy.” Her voice is warm and soft, stirring that odd feeling in Shy. It eases him enough to make him look to her again. Her hazel eyes are welcoming and full of love.

“I’m not happy. I’m not sad, nor am I anything. Anything other than scared, Info. I’m scared that I’ll damage how others see you. You’re an aid, for fuck’s sake! Image is big!” He sighs and grips the shirt he’d been folding, wrinkling it and ruining his work. “Logically, I know you’re not going to hurt me. But…”

Info only places a hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay. Go get changed and we’ll eat somewhere.” She smiles and places a gentle kiss on Shy’s forehead, getting that odd feeling to stir inside of him again. He likes the feeling; it’s warm, fuzzy, and makes him feel safe. Like she’d take care of him until she could no longer stand.

He obeys and walks off to his room, pausing upon spotting a present on his bed. He closes the door behind him and looks at the note left on the blue and white wrapping. _“Shy, I got this for you because it’s been too long for you to have to wear baggy clothing just to pass. It’s called a binder and you have to be careful with it but, it should start your first steps into manhood. -Info.”_

Shy tilts his head and unwraps it. It’s a… tight T-shirt of sorts? Reminds him of a bra but tighter. There is a small booklet on it and he takes his time reading it, curious as to why he needs instructions to put on what is basically a compressed bra. But, he follows them to a tee in fear of being punished despite logic saying he was safe.

He looks at his reflection and gasps at having almost no signs of having breasts. He rushes to his vanity mirror and smiles, laughing at his breasts being completely hidden. Yeah, it’s a little hard to breathe but that’s fine because he can actually look like a guy!

He tosses on his favorite shirt- a tank top- and some shorts, running out and stopping at Informant. “I-info… You… didn’t h-have to…”

“I did. I want you to be happy and feel safe.” She kisses his forehead and he hugs her tightly, sobbing softly. “I’m never going to hurt you, dear. Now, may we go out?”

Shy smiles and breaks off from Informant. “…Y-yes.”

* * *

Shy smiles as he licks his ice cream cone and almost purrs at the chocolate flavor, though he can’t actually purr so he’s just stuck smiling. God, how long had it been? Too long, honestly. Informant helped him with most of his trauma and Shy had come to know the aids personally, though he did punch Warrior for the aid calling him a “tranny.”

He’s 207 mortal years now and, while he’s been focusing on his trauma, he wishes to join the Council again, though as a Healer. After all, Healer was so nice and the class helped many with trauma and other mental health problems. He wants to help others. He’s reminded of this when a kid rushes by and falls down, screaming at busting up his nose and face.

Shy shoves his ice cream into Informant’s hand, startling the poor woman, and walks over to the poor child, who has a ninja costume on. “Hey. You okay?” The kid looks up and whimpers at his bloody and scraped up nose. “You’re hurt, huh buddy?”

The kid flinches when Shy takes off his shirt. He’s fine with his binder showing. Hell, those who know him know he’s trans and some of the shit he’s struggled with. “Here. Wipe your nose.” The kid glances at him before taking the shirt and holding it to his bloody nose. “There. Why are you running around so much anyways?”

“I was playing!” The kid jumps when another runs by him, skidding to a stop and almost falling over himself. “Bdubs!”

“Etho! You’re bleeding! I’m taking you to mommy!” Bdubs helps who is apparently Etho to his feet and drags him away.

“Bye, mister! Thank you for your shirt!” Shy blinks and waves. Then, he realizes that the kid just took his favorite shirt!

“MOTHERFUCKER!”

“Be careful, Shy.” Informant almost sneaks up on him and gives him his ice cream back. “That child is destined for something great. He has Warrior blood in his veins.”

“I doubt blood determines your class, Info.” Shy eats some of his ice cream. “Hell, I had a small stint as an Informant 20 years back before we realized the god of information can’t keep his mouth shut.” He laughs before Informant shakes her head.

“No, quite literally. He does not know it but I can see it in his features. Warrior is his father. That is why his mother is single. It was a quick affair and Etho was born from it.” She pointed out a woman with clearly soft features and, while Etho had some of those softer features, he had more a more rugged build like Warrior.

Shy tilts his head before shrugging. “Poor kid. To have such an asshole as a father… Informant, when he gets older, I’m going to be his friend!”

Informant blinks before chuckling and adjusting her cloak, giving Shy a quick kiss to the forehead. “Just don’t give away your godhood and I can see what I can do about letting you get to know him later in his life.”

“Sweet!” Shy laughs and takes a giant bite of his ice cream, coughing and gripping his head only a few moments later. “MOTHERFUCKER!”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It;s 12 am and this is very tiredly edited help  
TW: terrorism, explosives, possible death, refusal of help for mental illness, guns

“Alright. Shy, you need to work on your glamour.” Info hands Shy his shirt, allowing him to put it on quickly and far more efficiently than someone should be able to with a binder on. “If you are to pass as a new member, you must be able to look the part. You pick up on skills rather quickly-“

“Because I’m the god of information.” Shy interrupts.

“Yes. Because you are the god of information…” Info’s voice has irritation to it. Shy’s prone to interrupting others and she’s not exactly happy about it, that much is obvious. “So an effective glamour should be easy for you. But, a nice man named Kuddy will be your mentor. He’s a friend of Etho’s so perhaps you will get to know him.”

“Sweet! Has the kid ever found out who his dad is?” Shy was curious about Etho’s well-being.

“Shy he’s in his 30’s now and he has a child. He’s not a kid anymore. But, no. His mother died with the secret.” Info waves her hand and Shy puts up his glamour, forcing himself to look 16; he was really good at this. “Go to the center statue and Kuddy will meet you there. I have some stuff I need to take care of.”

“Can do! Love you, Info!” He runs out, aware of Info smiling. They had developed a mother-son bond since Shy had come to live with her. It was far nicer than the relationship he had with Skoyae. Hell, Info even understands why Shy refuses to call her Mom.

Shy makes his way to the statue of the original aid- a human male with a tall build and muscles. He wonders who was the original aid to Headmaster but decides it isn’t worth it. He’d research it later. “Hey! You must be Shy!”

Shy turns and notices a teenager or young adult with red, freckled skin running towards him with a grown Etho following behind. “I’m Python!”

“Oh… uhm… Y-yeah. I’m Shy. Where’s my mentor?”

“Dad says he’s sick today so he’ll help you get used to the basics of training!” Python grins before Shy notices something… shift in him? It’s near impossible to notice but Shy’s glad he’s able to pick up on information easily. “By the way, this is my dad! His name is Etho!”

Etho’s face turns red and he chuckles. “N-now Python… I love you but I’m not officially your dad…” Damn, Etho has really grown up. He seems like he’s in his late 20’s now. “But, yes. Kuddy is sick so I’m going to train you and Python in some basic fighting moves. It’ll be nice for him to have a sparring partner, after all.”

“Okay.” Shy would question why he needs fighting practice but even Healers need to be able to defend themselves. Info had warned him of fighting practice, anyways. “Let’s go!”

“Awesome!” Python takes off running and Shy’s happy. As the god of information, Shy can see many different paths for Python. Most are good but one does worry him. One that leads to harm.

* * *

Shy’s feet pound against the floor as he desperately searches for Etho or Python. He’s just started Warrior training but his Healer instincts are screaming for him to help anyone who might be hurt right now. It has yet to happen. He has yet to cause so much pain and harm.

Shy skids to a stop next to Etho, watching Python stand at the base of the statue of the original aid with Bdubs tied up. Etho notices his apprentice beside him and jumps a little. “S-shy! Why does Python have Bdubs tied up like that?! Do you know?”

“…” Shy wants to say something but he knows it’s too late. So, he just braces himself and closes his eyes, a gunshot ringing out before he’s tackled to the ground.

It’s all chaos for a few minutes. Seems like Python- or rather, Viper- wanted revenge on the Council for trying to get rid of him and the other alters. Shy punches his attacker in the face before headbutting them, sending them reeling back in pain. He gets up and looks at Viper standing atop the statue, attempting to strap something to it.

Shy’s curious until he notices Etho drawing back a bow and arrow. “ETHO, STOP-“ He fires and Viper notices as soon as the arrow makes contact with the bomb and starts knocking it out of the way. He slams his hand down on a button and it explodes, sending Viper flying into a building with a trail of blood and Shy to the ground.

All paths led to Python most likely dying from his injuries. All paths mean Shy will lose his best friend. His crush. Someone leaps onto Shy and he is pulled back into the fighting, determined to let Etho get to his son in time.

* * *

Shy blinks as he drops his glamour. Normally, he’d keep it up until he got home but he’s fine in the alley without it. Rarely anyone came here, if he’s entirely honest. That’s why he’s surprised to see Python in the alley after only a few moments.

A quick look over and it’s easy to tell that Birch is fronting. “Uh… You’re… not Python?” Shy says awkwardly.

“You’re not Shy,” Birch simply says in some way to save the situation.

“Uhm… You never got your alters all merged, huh?” Shy takes a step towards Birch.

“You’re a god?”

They both stare at each other in silence before nodding. “I won’t tell about the alters if you keep my godhood a secret?”

“Deal.”


	6. Chapter 6

When Shy died, he knew he’d experience major events in his life all over again. He knew he’d relieve all of those memories as blood filled his lungs and drowned him. But, he never expected to wake up in his bed. Did he respawn? He looks around before noticing that he is… different?

He walks to a mirror and observes himself. His entire right half is robotic now and he had some form of wrist band attached to his right arm, though his hand is still flesh. He has a halo with Galactic letters floating around it. “Hermit god?” He is confused but shakes it off, looking at his outfit. It’s almost like a dress? Not quite, though.

It’s light blue and has two trails on the end, which flow with his energy. He still has his trans wristband, though it’s more like a sleeve at this point. He also has these… wings of sorts. They’re really tech based and are a teal of sorts. He waves his hand and pulls up a few, purple-ish screens with text on them. “Players? Status?”

He’s honestly even more confused so he goes out to find Xisuma. The admin should know what to do! He exits his base to see that the damage from Skoyae is… almost recovered? How long has it been? Ren and Nate are even mostly healed, pointing towards it being quite a while. He spots Xisuma talking to Grian and races over, skidding to a stop before the admin. “Xisuma!”

Xisuma passes right through him, causing his form to waver for a few moments. “…I… Xisuma?” He walks next to the other and waves his hand in front of Xisuma’s face. “Hey! I’m here!” Nothing.

Reality hits Shy like a fuck ton of bricks. He never respawned. His soul was never put to rest- a practice often used by the Council for those who passed honorably. He was… not quite a ghost but not quite alive either. The letters made sense now. He had reached his full protentional, but at what cost? He was… He could never interact with his family again.

Shy sunk to the ground and whimpered, tears filling his eye. “What did I even do to deserve an existence like this?” He sobs softly. “Haven’t I suffered enough?”

* * *

Shy smiles at Joe grabbing a few books. Shy loved to write with Joe so they had written a few books together for the two kids on the server. “Oh, Joe. Keep on writing, please.” Shy’s honestly worried about how depressed the other had been lately. Unlike Python, everybody knew Shy was dead. Gone. Joe had stopped writing and often spoke without his usual poetic prose nowadays despite it being 7 months.

He floats after Joe as the other walks from Shy’s living room. They were preparing for a new season, which Shy honestly had to work on. Ever since he died, he had found that he was basically an admin/god to Hermitcraft. Joe waves to Xisuma and walks over to the group, which consists of X, Grian, and Python.

“Got what you needed?” Xisuma asks. He’s wearing Shy’s asexual spade necklace in memory of his boyfriend. Grian has Shy’s transgender wristband and Python got possession of Shy’s tool kit for his braces and other projects. That left Joe with Shy’s books.

“…Ready as I can be, if I’m honest.” Joe sighs and Shy wants to hug him. To tell him it’ll be okay. But, he knows that’s impossible. Grian hugs Joe for Shy.

“We all miss him.” Grian’s voice wavers and he sobs softly into Joe’s shirt. “T-trust me.”

“The best we can do is… live on for him. He died for us.” Xisuma hugs the two others and Python joins in, all four remaining members of the Dad Group crying softly over Shy’s passing. “It’ll be okay…”

They eventually break off and Xisuma starts building the portal leading to the new world. The others are gathering around now, all ready to go forth. Nate clings to Etho and Emerald is in TFC’s arms. “Dad… Are we really leaving this place behind? After Shy saved us?”

Etho blinks and lowers his head. No doubt he’s depressed. Etho had adopted a brotherly role to Shy and it hit him just as hard as it did the Dad Group. “Nate, we jump worlds for a reason and… I doubt Shy would want us to stay in one place just to be depressed.”

“I know he wouldn’t. He hated us getting depressed,” TFC points out, adjusting a very tired Emerald.

“He’d want us to move on. Keep him in memory but live happily so he doesn’t come back from the dead to kick our ass,” Cleo states. “Though I wouldn’t mind him being a zombie like me.” She smiles to ease some of the tension.

Xisuma finishes the portal and goes to light it. Nothing. He is clearly confused and the hermits are starting to question what is going on. “Why won’t it light?” He asks no one in particular. Shy feels himself drawn to the portal and touches it as Xisuma tries again. A pulse of energy is shot through it and it lights up. “…Strange.”

“Well, is everybody ready?” Xisuma asks. Everybody nods and Shy notices Python fiddle with a small phantom plush. Ah, so he stole that from Shy after he passed. Figures. The braces and their kit wouldn’t exactly be a great memory gift for Python. “Let’s go.”

Everybody entered the portal and began transferring to the new world. Python and Xisuma were the last two. “…For Shy?” Xisuma asks.

“…For Shy.” Xisuma walks in and Python spends one last time looking around and Shy can’t help but to shudder when Python’s gaze falls upon him. “For Shy.” He wheels himself in and Shy follows, knowing he’d have to help out with the new world.

Yeah, he was dead. It… wasn’t fun. But, he had a new purpose. He loved his Hermit family and he would die hundreds of times for them. Now he could protect them as a god. As the god of Hermitcraft.

Shy’s story seems like it’s over but it lives on in his family. In the people he loves and in the server he died for. “I’m fine with this. With never being able to interact with them ever again. As long as they’re safe.” He smiles and watches everyone split apart to make their own bases. Things would be fine.


	7. Author's Note

Oh, what? This story is short as hell! Yeah, that was intentional. I just wanted to showcase major events in Shy's life. Some stuff that might explain his behavior. I also wanted to give bits on information that just might explain other stuff. Now, Shy's happy and, while he may not be able to talk to his Hermitfam <strike>for now, </strike>he's now the god of Hermitcraft so he's okay with that. I don't have much to say about this story other than it's not the final chapter of the Secrets Universe. I'm evil but... Welll, you'll have to see how I'm _not _evil >:)

Be on the lookout for more stories because I love Shy and am **not **gonna keep him hurting forever. ;)


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